Our mam’s as honest as the day and she don’t never lie. Not ever. As God is her witness, she says. Hand on her heart. Lying is only the Devil speaking through us, she says.
Da’s standing behind her and he’s acting daft, making faces where she can’t see. He’s got his fingers in his ears and his eyes is rolling ‘round in his head and his tongue making silent la-la-la’s.
Da lies, see, and that’s a daylight fact. Like when mam puts his tea down to him and she asks him how it is and he always says it’s like manna from bloomin’ Heaven, even when mam’s burnt the taters or forgot to salt ‘em. And he lies when mam says Aunt Daisy’s coming over later for a cup of tea and da says ‘goodness’ and ‘it’ll be good to see her,’ but he takes himself off to the pub just the same and just ‘fore she arrives.
And if mam’s looking at something in the catalogue and she’s fallen cartwheels in love with a particular dress, making dove-calls over it and stroking the page like it’s made of fine cloth, and she wonders if they could maybe afford that dress in the next month. Well, da says, quick as lickety-split, ‘course they can.
Da saying it quick so he aint got time to think ‘bout it; saying it quick so mam don’t see the lie in what he’s saying – cos truth is we don’t got two pennies to rub together at the end of a ord’nary month, or even the one penny, and da’ll have to take on extra shifts at his work so mam can have her pretty-as-a-garden-in-summer dress and so her having the dress won’t make no difference to the food on the table.
Da’s fast and prudent lie is all to keep mam sweet, see, the whole world sweet, too. And the promise of a new dress is all it takes for doors to shut soft as breath in our house, and mam singing like a linnet when she’s working in the kitchen, and kissing da when he comes in from his work after half-five and not pushing his hand away when he touches her diddies, sly, and they don’t know we see that.
As for mam’s cooking, well, there’s no changing that, not ‘less the lie da tells her when he says it’s manna from Heaven is a lie he also tells himself and a lie he takes on faith, like we’s supposed to do with God. And when he says that ‘bout mam’s unsalted taters tasting Heavenly, well he says it slow as slithers and like that even I can’t see no lie in his saying it.
Just noticed that you commented here in repines to my piece. Thanks, Patty. I seem to have neglected this site some recently. Been wrapped up in other things – writerly things at least. Hope you are well and that we are closer to reading something new from you soon. Best always, Lindsay.
Thanks, Lindsay. Wanted to let you know I am out here and recovering from a hip replacement, so haven’t been active on the site. Tell me more about your literary projects when you can. Eager to see what is up in your writing world!
Sorry to hear about the hip. Hope you are recovering well. No big news at this end, though I have been doing a lot – including a university creative writing course in the evenings this past couple of months. Good feedback from that. Hope you are getting lots of time to write. Best wishes.
Patricia Ann McNair 
Our mam’s as honest as the day and she don’t never lie. Not ever. As God is her witness, she says. Hand on her heart. Lying is only the Devil speaking through us, she says.
Da’s standing behind her and he’s acting daft, making faces where she can’t see. He’s got his fingers in his ears and his eyes is rolling ‘round in his head and his tongue making silent la-la-la’s.
Da lies, see, and that’s a daylight fact. Like when mam puts his tea down to him and she asks him how it is and he always says it’s like manna from bloomin’ Heaven, even when mam’s burnt the taters or forgot to salt ‘em. And he lies when mam says Aunt Daisy’s coming over later for a cup of tea and da says ‘goodness’ and ‘it’ll be good to see her,’ but he takes himself off to the pub just the same and just ‘fore she arrives.
And if mam’s looking at something in the catalogue and she’s fallen cartwheels in love with a particular dress, making dove-calls over it and stroking the page like it’s made of fine cloth, and she wonders if they could maybe afford that dress in the next month. Well, da says, quick as lickety-split, ‘course they can.
Da saying it quick so he aint got time to think ‘bout it; saying it quick so mam don’t see the lie in what he’s saying – cos truth is we don’t got two pennies to rub together at the end of a ord’nary month, or even the one penny, and da’ll have to take on extra shifts at his work so mam can have her pretty-as-a-garden-in-summer dress and so her having the dress won’t make no difference to the food on the table.
Da’s fast and prudent lie is all to keep mam sweet, see, the whole world sweet, too. And the promise of a new dress is all it takes for doors to shut soft as breath in our house, and mam singing like a linnet when she’s working in the kitchen, and kissing da when he comes in from his work after half-five and not pushing his hand away when he touches her diddies, sly, and they don’t know we see that.
As for mam’s cooking, well, there’s no changing that, not ‘less the lie da tells her when he says it’s manna from Heaven is a lie he also tells himself and a lie he takes on faith, like we’s supposed to do with God. And when he says that ‘bout mam’s unsalted taters tasting Heavenly, well he says it slow as slithers and like that even I can’t see no lie in his saying it.
Welcome back, Lindsay! You were dearly missed. Thank you for this.
Just noticed that you commented here in repines to my piece. Thanks, Patty. I seem to have neglected this site some recently. Been wrapped up in other things – writerly things at least. Hope you are well and that we are closer to reading something new from you soon. Best always, Lindsay.
Thanks, Lindsay. Wanted to let you know I am out here and recovering from a hip replacement, so haven’t been active on the site. Tell me more about your literary projects when you can. Eager to see what is up in your writing world!
Sorry to hear about the hip. Hope you are recovering well. No big news at this end, though I have been doing a lot – including a university creative writing course in the evenings this past couple of months. Good feedback from that. Hope you are getting lots of time to write. Best wishes.